Sexual partners & sex numbers
The percentage of women who have had a lower number of
sexual partners (10 or less) is generally higher than men, according
TO an ABC News’ poll,
THE American Sex Survey.
AND at
THE start of
THE tier of 11 partners
AND above,
THE percentage of men increases while
THE number of women decreases.
In other words, comparatively,
THE majority of men have had a higher number of sexual partners,
AND the majority of women have had a lower number of partners. Psychologist
AND Professor Norman R Brown
AND his colleagues at
THE University of Michigan report that -- on average -- by
THE time a man is
IN his 40s, he has had 31.9 partners, while women have had 8.6 partners.
What does the sex number mean?
But women don’t need
statistics TO know that typically a man’s number is significantly higher
AND more socially acceptable. Men can
BE more open about
sexual activity with multiple partners,
AND it’s considered acceptable for them
TO give precedence
TO the shape of a woman’s legs over her lifelong goals. Who hasn’t heard inappropriate comments made about women followed by
THE universal
AND pathetic excuse, “But I’m a guy...”
Conversely, women’s sexual histories
AND beneath-the-sheets activities remain hush-hush. Unlike weight, there’s
NO BMI
TO pinpoint a healthy sexual lifestyle. “The number” has morphed into another notch
IN the bedpost for men --
AND a self-deprecating representation of past failures
IN search of Mr Right for women.
Why such a stigma?
Why should our sexual past carry such a stigma that we’re reluctant
TO reveal our number, even
TO our gynecologists? A woman
IN her late-20s says, “I think men prefer women
TO be more pure than they are. It’s a turnoff if they think a woman is more sexually experienced. It’s a blow
TO the ego.”
This creates a problem if men expect TO have sexual adventures when young, yet settle down with “conservative” wives years later. This leads TO women being judged for being "prudish" when young -- yet any subjective “high” number insinuates sloppy intoxication, low self-esteem or a need for attention down THE road.
A number, however, that seems TO get overlooked AND under-judged is oral sex partners. Somehow it’s become acceptable TO have an infinite number of oral sex partners, as opposed TO the number of intercourse partners. Fair or not, foreplay has less social AND emotional repercussions, besides being defined as a tease.
Does casual sex carry emotional benefits, not only baggage?
A young woman explains, “I’m much more inclined
TO have sexual experiences with someone I know I don’t have a future with. It’s a defense because I don’t get hurt.” Some women have one-night stands as a way
TO receive sexual pleasure. Others use it
TO stave off hurt or gain equal ground
IN future relationships. Sometimes, sex becomes a spiteful
AND defensive action against men -- an attempt at unemotional, unattached, hot-animal sex.
One woman explains that a one-night stand for her made her feel powerful for her next sexual relationship, as well as helping her overcome a brutal breakup. Another woman, who refers TO her sexual fling as "Mr Z," says that he “helped me TO feel wanted again, AND gave me THE opportunity TO a rebuild badly shattered self-confidence,” after her fiancé left her.
Although most women would agree that NO matter how hard they try TO keep sex casual, emotions often get involved -- AND attempts at being Samantha Jones from Sex & THE City leave them feeling shameful AND lonely.
How are women keeping up with THE times?
With significant social changes taking place, such as couples waiting longer
TO marry
AND an increase
IN the prevalence of reliable birth control methods, women will increasingly have healthy sexual histories on par with men.
TO expect men
TO accept higher numbers
AND more experiences from potential wives, women should also
BE confidently comfortable with their own non-monogamous, active sexual lifestyle. Steamy nights might lead
TO romance or they might fizzle out
TO be just another hook-up.
But like turning a year older, another number might just mean more experience AND wisdom both inside AND outside THE bedroom -- which is beneficial TO both sexes.
